News from the Tennessee Valley Columnists
WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 17, 2005
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YOU DON'T SAY
Steve Stewart

Jesus' home remedies -- and dads'

Cathy Strickland, director of children's ministries at Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church, did not realize what she had unleashed when she dovetailed the Children's Minute to the sermon, which focused on John 9.

In that chapter, Jesus applies mud to the eyes of a blind man, restoring his sight.

As Eric Fleischauer describes it, Cathy asked the eager children whether they ever got boo-boos, and what their daddies do to make it better. One said he gave it a kiss; another mentioned her dad used a Band-Aid.

Steering carefully, Cathy asked whether Jesus, like their fathers, was showing love when he put mud on the blind man's eyes. There was a puzzled silence. One boy said mud might work on boo-boos, "but milk works with me."

Another followed with a guess. "Was the mud like Neosporin?"

Gators for real

Wanda Latham did not pay attention to her daughter's warnings about alligators in the back yard, Deangelo McDaniel reports.

But after reading a story in THE DAILY about an alligator sighting in Northwest Decatur, she will probably listen more closely to 9-year-old Marion Laura Saint.

The family lives at 20th Street and Enolam Boulevard Southeast.

"When it rains, we get a lot of rain in the yard and she always says, 'There goes another alligator,' " Wanda said.

Until she read the story, Wanda did not know that the government had released alligators in Wheeler National Wildlife Refuge.

"I'll pay closer attention to what my daughter says," the mother said.

Juvenile distractions

M.J. Ellington tells about a reporter asking state Superintendent of Education Joe Morton why test scores at middle and junior high schools seemed to lag behind elementary and high schools.

"There are people who work with middle school students who will tell you that puberty has something to do with it," Joe answered. "They just have other things on their minds."

Dollar needed laundering ...

The owner of a Decatur carwash called police to tell them he found a $1 bill.

Thinking it odd the man didn't just stuff the bill into his pocket, Chris Paschenko asked for more information.

Police said the bill was stained red, and the man thought it might be blood. Police took the bill as evidence.

... So did coins

Meanwhile, Eric tells about 11-year-old John, back from a stint at Kids Interested in Volunteer Service. When his father asked what he had been doing, he calmly said, "I was laundering money."

Excuse me?

Truth is, he was. He and other volunteers were washing coins that had been thrown into fountains to benefit the Mental Health Association in Morgan County.

Send stories for You Don't Say to steve@decaturdaily.com or call Weekend Editor Steve Stewart at 340-2444. Or write P.O. Box 2213, Decatur, AL 35609. DAILY staff members contribute many of the items you see here.

Steve Stewart Steve Stewart
DAILY Weekend Editor

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