News from the Tennessee Valley Columnists

Steve Stewart

Troy fan takes down critic at FSU

Kate Klepper attended what should have been a football mismatch between Florida State University and Troy University in Tallahassee, Fla. Surprisingly, the halftime score was 10-10.

At the concession stand, an FSU fan made derogatory comments about a Troy graduate, his school-spirited shirt, and the overall quality of football in Florida versus Alabama.

The Troy grad responded:

"We're in your stadium, with your refs, in front of 70,000 of your fans, and you're only playing even with the third best team in Alabama.

"Not to mention that they've been Division I for less than a decade, and you paid us half a million dollars to come down here and embarrass you. Do you really want to talk to me about this football game?"

Auburn? Alabama?

After the above-mentioned FSU fan retreated, another Troy fan asked, "Third best team in Alabama, huh? OK, so Hoover's first, but who is second?"

Home improvement

Barbecue, beer and live music are always Riverfest staples, but Kate was surprised that home decor made this list, as well.

As one attendee left Saturday night's events, he persuaded a Budweiser representative to allow him to take home the life-size Dale Earnhardt Jr. cutout that had decorated the draft-beer tent.

He didn't plan to decorate his own home with the visage of No. 8.

He was overheard saying, "I think I'm gonna give it to Momma."

Remember Columbus

People attending a Willie Nelson concert in Montgomery on Sunday night came dressed in everything from Willie-style headbands with attached pigtails to outrageous shirts and shorts, M.J. Ellington reports.

One shirt drew laughs from liberals and even some conservatives.

The otherwise ordinary tan T-shirt sported the big, bold words "HOMELAND SECURITY." An illustration showed four Native Americans in feathered headdresses sitting on horses and holding spears. Then came the slogan: "Fighting Terrorism Since 1492."

Eat a roach, break in line

Here's a way to avoid standing in line — if you have the stomach for it.

As part of its Halloween-themed FrightFest, Six Flags Great America in Gurnee, Ill., is daring customers to eat a live Madagascar hissing cockroach in exchange for unlimited line-jumping privileges.

The health department has its doubts, according to The Associated Press. Bill Mays, community health director, says consuming live cockroaches might increase risks of gastrointestinal illness and allergies.

It will not be over with one quick swallow. These bugs are 2 to 3 inches long, so you will have to bite one into pieces.

Send stories for You Don't Say to, or call Weekend Editor Steve Stewart at 340-2444. Or write P.O. Box 2213, Decatur, AL 35609. DAILY staff members contribute many of the items you see here. This column appears Sundays and Wednesdays.

Steve Stewart Steve Stewart
DAILY Weekend Editor

Leave feedback
on this or

Email This Page