News from the Tennessee Valley Columnists

Steve Stewart

If football disappoints, try a parade

A winning float helps make up for a losing a football game.

The Friends in Ripley float took the grand prize for the third straight year in the Athens Christmas parade.

Gayle Black said her son started focusing on this year’s float after an Auburn game. Gayle said Shane usually takes the family to one Auburn game a year, but he picks a game Auburn should win so she won’t heckle him about losing.

This year, he picked the Auburn-Arkansas game, which Arkansas won 27-10.

“He was so upset, but didn’t want to act upset,” Gayle told Holly Hollman. “He said he wished he knew what the parade’s theme would be so he could think about a float instead of the game.”

Spirit of Christmas

Though the wind chill was in the single digits Thursday night as Daily reporter Kristen Bishop was ringing the Salvation Army bell, she had no problem staying warm thanks to the kindness of strangers.

During her one-hour stint in front of Wal-Mart, four people stopped to hug her, one woman offered her a blanket that she had just purchased, and a West Morgan High senior bought her a ski mask.

After the teen, who gave only his first name, Daniel, saw Kristen shivering, he went inside and returned with a fleece mask that kept her nose and cheeks warm and cozy.

Not on the housetop

The Christmas Chimney has returned to Athens.

Bobby and Barbara Lindsay own the chimney that stands by itself in a field next to Country Club Acres on U.S. 31.

The couple put a wreath on the chimney each holiday.

They told Holly for a story last year that they welcome people taking photographs in front of the structure.

So if you need a unique Christmas card picture, or just want to drive by and look, the chimney awaits.

Hiding place

When Limestone County and Athens lawmen arrested three people accused of hiding $20,000 worth of cocaine inside a DVD player, it brought to mind a joke that Amy Pollick passed along.

A man called a sheriff’s office somewhere to report that his neighbor, Virgil, was “hidin’ marijuana inside his firewood.” Deputies descended on Virgil’s house. They split open every piece of wood but found no marijuana, so they left empty-handed.

Pretty soon, Virgil’s phone rang.

“Did the sheriff come?” his neighbor asked. “... Did they chop your firewood? ... Happy birthday, buddy!”

Send stories for You Don’t Say to, or call Weekend Editor Steve Stewart at 340-2444. Or write P.O. Box 2213, Decatur, AL 35609. Daily staff members contribute many of the items you see here. This column appears Sundays and Wednesdays.

Steve Stewart Steve Stewart
DAILY Weekend Editor

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