News from the Tennessee Valley Columnists
SUNDAY, MAY 13, 2007
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YOU DON'T SAY
Steve Stewart

Married, but won’t leave Mom behind

A man received a marriage license in Decatur after one of his tattoos reminded him how to spell his mother’s name.

Morgan County Probate Judge Greg Cain told Chris Paschenko that the man spelled her name incorrectly on the application, and clerk Denise Iovino needed the correct spelling.

Denise said the man then lifted his shirt, which revealed stomach tattoos that spelled his mother’s and father’s names.

Taking sides

When the president and CEO of ThyssenKrupp’s giant new South Alabama steel plant got up to speak at Friday’s announcement that Alabama landed the plant, its was apparent he’d already had an introduction to Alabama sports.

Now a resident of Tecumseh, Ontario, Canada, Robert P. Soulliere said his family will move to Alabama, but they have a dilemma.

“The dilemma is, should it be Roll Tide or War Eagle?” he asked, as reported by M.J. Ellington.

“Roll Tide!” yelled former Lt. Gov. Steve Windom, sitting beside a serious Auburn fan who disagreed.

“The Roll Tides were louder,” said Steve, a politician turned lobbyist.

Campus troubleshooter

In 1978, Bradley Byrne was visiting Monroeville, representing gubernatorial candidate Fob James.

Bradley’s host took him to see the empty auditorium at Patrick Henry State Junior College, recently constructed but useless because the state had run out of money for seats.

Bradley must have made some notes. Before long, Fob was running a TV commercial that showed him walking through the auditorium, shining a flashlight. “As your governor,” he declared, “I won’t tolerate this kind of politics and waste.”

To many people’s surprise, Fob was elected governor. By the time he took office, the powers that be — perhaps embarrassed — had put seats in the auditorium.

Now, Bradley has plenty of other college problems to solve. He’s the new chancellor of the two-year college system.

Can’t agree on anything

Ronnie Thomas reports that Priceville Town Councilman John Oakley seconded Councilman Tim Crow’s motion to adjourn Thursday night’s meeting.

When it came his turn to vote, Mayor Melvin Duran voted no.

Melvin was just keeping pace with one of those nights full of no votes, including one of his own, opposing the purchase of weed killer.

Answering service

Katie Kamar, 18, gets unusual cell phone calls for a teenager.

Her number once belonged to Michigan Gov. Jennifer Granholm. Katie has had it five months. At first she was getting about six of the governor’s calls per day, and she still receives one or two, according to an Associated Press report from Lansing, Mich.

“It would be an honor to be governor, but people want to talk to you 24-7,” Katie said. “This experience hasn’t given me any political aspirations.”

One of her calls came from the governor, who apologized and thanked her for being nice to the callers.

Send stories for You Don’t Say to steve@decaturdaily.com, or call Weekend Editor Steve Stewart at 340-2444. Or write P.O. Box 2213, Decatur, AL 35609. Daily staff members contribute many of the items you see here.

Steve Stewart Steve Stewart
DAILY Weekend Editor

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