News from the Tennessee Valley Columnists
SUNDAY, JULY 15, 2007
STEVE STEWART | COLUMNISTS | HOME | ARCHIVES

YOU DON'T SAY
Steve Stewart

How dry? Just ask the fish

Anthony Backwood teaches the adult men’s Sunday school class at Oak Forest Baptist Church near Somerville.

Pastor Jimmy Smith says the men were discussing the drought before class, talking of gardens and crops failing. Anthony chimed in with problems in his pond.

“I have 2-month-old catfish in my pond that don’t even know how to swim!” he said.

Never satisfied

This year’s Spirit of America golf tournament at Burningtree Country Club ventured a little deeper into the Internet age, with live scoring every three holes of the golfers’ rounds in progress.

When Michael Wetzel asked tournament co-director Andy Villarreal whether the new feature was a success, he chuckled.

“Oh, yes. Now some folks are complaining and wondering why we didn’t have it hole by hole,” Andy said.

Pomp and circumstance

Decatur City Schools’ Jeanne Payne recently defended her dissertation and earned her doctorate from The University of Alabama and The University of Alabama at Birmingham.

Jeanne told Bayne Hughes that Rotary Club of Decatur member Mark Heard decided the club needed to celebrate, and they threw her a mock graduation. Dan Gifford played a graduation march as she walked to the podium. State Sen. Arthur Orr put a mortarboard on her head, and Harvey Pride wrapped her with a red satin graduation gown. Rotary members wore mortarboards.

“I was so shocked, but it was the best graduation I ever had,” Jeanne said.

Luggage layover in Paris

When Martin and Maria Lima of Pontevedra, Spain, touched down at Huntsville International Airport on Wednesday, officials told them their luggage was in Paris.

Martin, an aircraft manufacturer, told Ronnie Thomas he came with his wife to Decatur to visit LSA Aero’s facilities at Pryor Field and to check out his new design, the Freedom S100 Amphibian.

He had shipped the plane to the company, which markets his creations.

The couple’s luggage showed up in Huntsville on Friday, and Stan Smith, LSA vice president, drove Martin over to retrieve it. The Spanish visitors hope for better luck when they fly out Monday to return to Pontevedra.

Wine versus a handgun

Friends were finishing dinner on a home patio in Washington, D.C., when a hooded man slid through an open gate and pointed a handgun at a 14-year-old girl’s head.

“Give me your money, or I’ll start shooting,” he said, according to The Associated Press.

“Why don’t you have a glass of wine with us?” responded guest Cristina Rowan, 43.

The intruder sipped some of the Chateau Malescot St-Exupery and exclaimed that it was “good wine.” The girl’s father, Michael Rabdau, 51, offered him the whole bottle. The robber also ate some Camembert cheese.

He put the gun in his sweatpants, apologized, and said, “I think I may have come to the wrong house. Can I get a hug?”

Five guests hugged him, he walked away with his wineglass — and they called 911. The last we heard, he was still at large.

Send stories for You Don’t Say to steve@decaturdaily.com, or call Weekend Editor Steve Stewart at 340-2444. Or write P.O. Box 2213, Decatur, AL 35609. Daily staff members contribute many of the items you see here. This column appears Sundays and Wednesdays.

Steve Stewart Steve Stewart
DAILY Weekend Editor

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